So today the Thai guy mentioned that he was going to an art museum. I thought that sounded like fun. He invited me to join him. I jet to the museum to find him dressed so casually(not business casual). I was glad that I was dressed ok. We talked as we went from exhibit to exhibit(I am sure I was the loudest person in the whole place, or it just felt like I was).
At the end of our meet up, he took me to a store(to grab some food because I was starving). I bought some dark chocolate(71% cacao). Someone had taken one of my apples earlier in the day(because I didn’t eat it fast enough) so I had only had some nuts and a medium granny smith apple.
We bonded over his extensive playlists(I am a sucker for a music fan). It was fun. I was in a good mood. I think I had asked him at some point if he went to church. He mentioned that he didn’t(Christian girl problem #1). He asked me if I still wanted to go to dinner tomorrow and I said yes because I had had a nice time.
Well, I hash out the details with three of my closest Christian supports. They reminded me of what my purpose was in dating. I am not dating just to date. I am dating in order to find a future mate. So, there is no point to date someone who does not share my same beliefs(no matter how hot he is). See that’s where I get in trouble(Christian girl problem #2). I have no problem glossing over important stuff if the guy is my type. That is so shallow of me.
I mentioned today that it seems like Christian girls are mandated to seek strong believers while Christian guys just date whoever they feel like dating. So usually when a Christian girl is dating a non believer, it is usually because she has to settle because Christian guys aren’t asking her out(Christian girl problem #3).
So when this nice guy asked me what a devotional was(after I explained I was reading my daily devotional), I explained what it was and then promptly deleted my online dating profiles. I had six men on one site check out my profile(and not message me) and I had one hundred and fifty guys check out my profile, twenty guys messaged me, and two guys asked me out(both non believers). On another site, I had guys let me know that that was not the site for me(with ten messaging me), so I promptly removed myself from that site.
Also it is hard when we have these standards and ideals of what we are looking for in a mate and no one who even remotely fits that criteria is actively pursuing us. Then add in shame and guilt from the past making me wonder if a great guy would even want to be with me. To leave a wonderful, mixed up, mess.
I also got tired of having to answer the same set of questions twenty times in a row.I don’t understand why guys ask questions when they know they don’t care about the answer. That is not cute. I asked a guy why guys do that and his answer was that they are looking for attention.
So call me premature, disillusioned, or what have you but I just needed to give up the ghost and be content with where I am in this moment. In this moment, I am single. I have to draw closer to God and focus on His plan for my life. His plans are greater than any that I could imagine.
I have to have faith that when I am meant to be in a relationship God will lead me on that path. So having faith, waiting, and working on myself should be enough to keep me busy until that time comes.
Here’s to being true to yourself no matter what season you are in.