Tag Archives: Food

Thoughts

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     Today I told myself that I was going to have a good day. I was going to seek the positive and the good. I was going to take each moment as it came.
     My beginning moments were positive. They were filled with openness.  I was ready to take on the day.
     Then some negativity was introduced. I stayed calm.  I did some deep breathing.  I looked for balance.
      I went about my day. Then my words were questioned. I stated my purpose for my words. I was told that my words were taken negatively.  I explained that I could not help how my words(in a normal tone) were taken.
     Then it dawned on me that people never ask me why I am the way I am. People never ask me what it is like to experience the world through my eyes. I understand that everyone experiences the world differently.  But the world is a jungle of sorts. I can’t show fear or weakness.
     When I was little, I was a huge bully. When people made me mad, I started a fight with them. Outside of school I was bullied a couple of times.  It truly is a wonder I got schoolwork done because I lived in the principal’s office.  So when I went to junior high I was told that I couldn’t get into any more fights. Since I was tired of getting beat I did my best to stay out of trouble.
     When I got to high school the same rules applied.  I was bullied day in and day out because I always had a crush on someone else’s boyfriend(I was harmless) and there was a group that just hated me because. I only fought one bully at school and that was after school, she had bullied me everyday for six months until she decided to challenge me and I punched her and made her nose bleed. My vice principal hated me and had a fondness for my tormentors. My principal and counselor atleast listened to me.
     I was bullied at band camp more than once and I never fought back. Basically I just stopped fighting.  That doesn’t mean that I don’t know how to defend myself, its just that I use a lot of self restraint. 
     Words do hurt. I am the queen of a sarcastic, passive aggressive dig(usually agressive). So yeah people say the craziest things to me all of the time and I suck it up and take it because I know that if I said what really came to mind, the least you would do is cry.
     People don’t understand how much I go out of my way to be positive and tolerant of others who can’t even attempt to show me the slightest ounce of respect. Like I said you think you know but you have no idea. It’s also hard when you don’t have an immediate support system of people who have your back.
     A friend told me today that generally in the South people are more passive aggressive in their leanings. I have no problem doing the same but I prefer people to be direct with me.
     So right now I’m breathing and reflecting on life. I have some papers to work on. I’m debating if I am going to stuff these feelings with ice cream or not.

Keep moving forward
Namaste
    
     

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Why I Went Vegan

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Good morning blog readers!

I get this question a lot and thought it would be a good idea to mention it here.

I went vegan two years ago.

When I was a kid I ate everything and even had dreams about McDonalds.

A older neighbor gave me tofu once and I thought it was weird.

A friend’s family were vegetarian and I thought their house smelled weird.

I always ate fruit and veggies as snacks.

Fast forward to 2009

When I lived in Alaska I ate moose, caribou, beaver, and who knows what else. I felt bad and had no idea what animal I would eat next so I researched vegetarianism and proclaimed that I was a veghead.

Well that only lasted until I left Alaska.

In 2010(after my first half marathon), I decided to change my eating. So I cut my calories and started eating ‘clean’.

     In 2011 I continued researching vegetarianism(basically I read every book I could get my hand on and checked out every website). After hearing about Cindy Trimm’s 40 day Soul Fast(which had the beginners do the Daniel Fast). I decided that after I finished my 21 cans of tuna(because I was a broke clean eater), I started the Daniel Fast(which is a vegan base). I was pretty hardcore and weaned myself off of everything.

I worked out a lot(ok a lot is probably an understatement) and just with diet alone, I lost thirteen pounds. I was happy.

Then in 2012 things changed and I couldn’t completely control my diet, so I became a snacky vegan. I was also stressed out and gained atleast twenty pounds.

Today I am still vegan(working on the snacks) and I have a little under thirty pounds to lose to get to my goal weight. I don’t stress about my goal weight but it is there and I do hope to get there in time.

     Why am I still vegan? Some people ask me this. The reason why I am still vegan is because once I stopped eating me, I realized that my stomach doesn’t crave meat, it just wants food. I get my ‘chewing’ sensation with mushrooms and other chewy veggies. Also, I love spices and seasoning so when I do cook, my meals are the bomb(to me and whoever happens to walk by the kitchen). I try not to be a vegan nazi so if someone serves me something with meat in it that I can see, I just pick the meat out(aka Luby’s putting bacon in their cabbage).

     Why I’m not a perfect vegan: I still eat ice cream when I need it(aka that time of the month) and I still eat all kinds of chocolate. I am a chocoholic(I accept it and admit it). But those things are workable to me. Mostly I am kind to myself.

Also, I am a vegan because I love life and all kinds of animals. I see everything as having life in it(I know people make jokes about plants having life). So I feel like, if it bleeds, I’m not going to eat it(and yes, fish bleed).

So that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Thanks for reading :

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