You’re Special AKA When The Universe Says Try Again

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Hello beloved blog readers. You guys really are the best. You continue to check out my ramblings, the good, the bad, and the in between. So, I decided that I was going to do my best to not complain this year(or see how long I could go) and in the spirit of not being a quitter, let me spin this into the most positive post I can.

See I had a long, winding conversation with a person who so eloquently complimented me and let me down all at the same time. Oh, no I am not complaining I am just showing you that this is further proof that I am not meant to date. I am not meant to have a happily ever after. There will be no prince charming for me because Prince Charming has vanished. Where he went, no one knows.

All I know is that I am tired. I am worn, and weak, and tired. The only thing I am going to be dating is a book and running. Those two things never seem to let me down. They are consistent. They can withstand my moods and they understand. I don’t understand the whys or hows of why I screwed my life up so badly but it has come to this. I have been through too much in my life to waste anyone’s time let alone my own. So, since it all starts and ends with yours truly, let me take responsibility for myself and just continue to do what I need to do.

I just realized that even though I thought that I could manage to have time for another person, let alone another person that I thought I would be interested in, alas I do not. I don’t have time for the mental olympics involved to try and attempt to be normal while getting to know someone. That ship sailed a long time ago.

I am alive and that is all I can say about today.

Shalom

Namaste

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