As I was on my way to work this morning, I realized that I will have three years sober tomorrow. What a nice way to bring in Thanksgiving. I don’t know if I will be able to pick up a chip tomorrow but I will definitely get one sometime this week. So, looking back on my recovery so far I thought I would share things that I have learned and am grateful for.
1. Being sober gives me clarity
I think a lot(okay that is an understatement). But being sober gives me the opportunity to think things through fully and not so impulsively. I have tons of new thoughts that I can add to thoughts that may have been lost at one time. I am able to build a stronger foundation of thought due to being able to put things together and see how they all work together.
2. Being sober gives me new eyes
I love learning and being involved in the world around me. Being sober gives me the opportunity to enjoy life and bring a new perspective to it. It allows me to see the small details and helps magnify them so that I can enjoy things in a whole new way. I also have new eyes to see others. This clarity is kind of like my intuition illuminated. I can be a stronger judge of character and I can love without abandon. It also gives me new reflections on myself. It gives me the ability to truly be self aware and not run and hide from the truths about myself.
3. Being sober is how I was created to be
I lived most of my life in a sober state. I didn’t always know how to express all of my feelings in the right/acceptable way. I turned to alcohol to change how I felt. I thought alcohol would erase my shame, guilt, sadness, and anger but it only amplified it. Today I love my awkward, emotional, sensitive, sober self. I will not change who I am for anyone. Thankfully, I don’t have to. Being sober also helps me to see people as they really are.
This morning I went for a nice run. I am working on my papers. I am excited to spend time with friends.I can only do these things because I am sober.
I had a discussion with a friend about a detox(mainly a food detox). So, I am going to try and continue to be mindful and see how I can navigate the holidays. My friend also asked me to help keep her accountable. We are all on our own journey of growth and it is nice to have others for support on that road. So no matter what obstacles you face today, keep pushing, you are worth it.