Training Day 210 1/11/11


Hey sparkfriends!
I was so tired last night, I slept through my alarm this morning but brought my resistance bands to work. They are a lot of fun. I also did some pushups.
I am kind of confused because I don’t know which trainer certification to get. ACE, NASM, or ISSA. I have called atleast 8 gyms and NO ONE has called me back!
I like the areas that ACE offers and I also like the youth fitness area that ISSA offers. I have time. I just want to have the idea cemented in my head.
What is my goal: I just want to help people move and treat their bodies better.
I don’t have to work in a gym, I just want to have the knowledge base so that when I am able to work with someone, I have the foundations to help them.
I had a discussion with an older friend last night and she was like “What do you want to do?” Kind of implying why would I do all of this if I want to be a teacher. Well, I am currently a certified teacher(Special Ed, ESL, and elementary) who does NOT have a full time teaching job. So I feel like being certified in a middle school subject and a high school subject(plus the health areas that I enjoy), will broaden my resume and by that time if I am still not teaching full time, then Houston we will have a problem 🙂
See, I didn’t grow up having to struggle. I am not used to working two jobs at the same time every day(the last time I worked two jobs, I worked one job M-F and the other job maybe three nights a week). My older friend has spent her whole life working multiple jobs(I am not such a money seeker, that I enjoy it), so she is used to it. I also am not used to working two jobs and not having money to show for it(I won’t be receiving my three paychecks until atleast the 18th).
Basically, I feel like how long will I have to work these two jobs. Because at the moment, I am locked into my lease until Dec. I want to be in a position where I can live where I want to live and do something that I enjoy doing and if I am working two jobs I want it to be because I choose to do that not because I have to.
I am probably just cranky because my friend said(after I mentioned my schedule), why don’t you cut out the exercise so that you can sleep a little longer. Since she was an older friend, I could not say what was on the tip of my tongue, I only said no, I cannot do that I have to train.
Period. But, I guess that is what happens when you have plans and goals that others cannot see.
My friend was very surprised when she told me I could have a bag of potatoes and green beans and I ate the whole thing(the bag wasn’t really half filled), I justified it because it was only 250 calories. Boy, was I upset when I saw it on the scale this morning. But that happens 🙂
I guess I don’t really quite know how to put it into words. I had a guy friend text me over the weekend. He said that he wanted to hang out when he had some money(you know me of course I said ok). So, then he tells me that he had gotten into some trouble and he was looking for friendship and understanding(in my head I was like ummm we have only ever been friends you never pursued me and I didn’t super agressively pursue you). But he went on to say that he was just getting out of a relationship with a married woman and oh yeah, he has four kids. Hmmmm. I was shocked to say the least. I mean don’t get me wrong, he’s handsome but wow, talk about no self control. I also see that he is one of those people who when you give some information to, instead of listening, they spout off some nonsense that they believe and then wonder why it didn’t work out. So trust me, when I say he doesn’t have to worry about me, I mean it.
Then, this morning a crush from childhood says that he hopes to see me soon(umm in December he said Jan or Feb and we are in the throughs of Jan). Like I guess he forgot that he had a chance to see me last Dec-Jan and he blew it. So I said to him, if I see you, I see you if I don’t I don’t. I have gone this long without seeing you so it is what it is. No hard feelings(because all of my feelings for him seeped out of me last spring). He said to me “Well, that is a great way to look at it, real optimistic lmao”. So I said back “lol I know we are both busy people but when push comes to shove you know how much energy you want to put out there”. Then he says to me “Yeah, I understand. The more I put out the more I get back right?” I said “No, and actions speak way louder than words”.
I ended it with “We just have different focuses”. I cannot tell you how badly I just wanted to say kick rocks.
Did he really think I would be waiting for him for 13 years?(because the last time I saw him I was 16, and I think we have been living in the same state since I was maybe 18). Did he really think that I was holding my breath for a year(we got reconnected Oct of last year). All I can say is no. He is delusional to think that I have put him above everything else in my life.
So, I guess all of this is just fueling the fire to me pursuing my goals. Even if it is one small step at a time.
I hope you are all having a good day and remember not to let anyone get you off track!
I don’t care if it is someone who doesn’t believe in you but who smiles in your face, or if it is someone who is encouraging you but always manages to slide a little negativity in the conversation. As far as I am concerned, the only person who needs to give you negativity is yourself(and then you use the rest of yourself to quench it) and we know God isn’t going to give you any negativity(when you are trying to move forward). So keep your head up and march on 🙂


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