Coding, Dark Nights Of The Soul, and Sunshine


For those of you who may or may not know, I had an epic midterm for Stats(it was due yesterday). I worked on it for seven and a half days. For seven days I had no output. For people who don’t code(I just started seven weeks ago), when your code doesn’t output, you don’t have anything to write up(aka to show or to describe). I spent as much time as I could in the library(because I don’t have internet at home and my computer is kind of a wackadoodle). I just remember crying for an hour while staring at my code. Typing and crying, backspacing and crying. I just felt like all was lost. I emailed my professor and asked for an extension(he said there were none) and I replied back with some sad wallowing in pity mess and told him thank you for listening. My professor is a certified genius(according to me). He is amazing. He makes stats and coding come to life. The thing is, he thinks that we are all just as brilliant as he is(in my dreams) and we are over here like “How do you open that file?” Because in our program(and our field), if you can’t do stats, there is no passing go, there is no collecting $200 dollars.

Then on day seven and a half, things starting clicking(my code was running). I had narrowed my errors down from 15 to 1. One error was all that stood between me and my writeup. So, two hours later, I was able to fix that last error(“Physical File does not exist” aka “You must refresh Filezilla”). I was relieved, I was excited, I was happy. Because the night before I was on the edge of giving up. My facebook friends encouraged me and supported me. They told me to youtube it(lol). They just knew things were going to work out.

Now I can’t say what my grade is going to look like, at this point I’m just elated that I did it and turned it in. Thankfully my professor does give partial credit. My classmates were worried because we had a chunk of people that didn’t come to class(and a few whispers about people dropping). I was glad to be able to stand up and say “Hey, I’m still here, we are going to make it”. It was a true spiritual experience. We all hugged after class. So we had a new lecture and got our next assignment.

So now I can breathe a little easier, finish up my assignment for Methods, and start my papers(start my stats paper and get deeper into my trends paper). I don’t think I’ve ever been so excited to do schoolwork(okay I’m always excited to do schoolwork). Its just this awesome feeling of, hey I’m doing this thing and life is good today.

So, all I can say is no matter what you are going through, there is light at the end of the tunnel. Things do work out just the way they are supposed to(aka everything happens for a reason, not always in our time, but in the time it is supposed to happen).




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