Being Honest


     I had an interesting conversation today with someone close to me. They said that I have to stay open to love. I thought that I was.
     I had another conversation with SP letting him know my thoughts and how I would be fine with us being friends if he wanted.  To me it seems like he is ok with me doing all the work. That gets old quick.
     I feel empty and alone. But why string someone along just because you don’t want to be alone. I prayed a lot. I guess it goes back to worth and what we think we deserve. I know I deserve more because I have no problem giving more.
     I’m praying for the best for both of us. I’m headed to bed. Hopefully tomorrow is better.


4 responses »

  1. Chill out, Jewel. You want to be in love, which is wildly different from loving someone. The latter is better. You don’t have to always be gushy and mushy to express affection. I always did nice things for my husband, which I thought told him how much I cared about him. He never understood. But of course he was a psychopath.


  2. Seriously, woman. You are trying way too hard. Just let it build and grow. You are way too much in a hurry, Plus the man is in a damn war zone. He’s got a few things to worry about. You are over thinking this relationship. Oh, and did I say that you are over thinking this relationship. Enjoy it for what it is for now. Jeez Louise. Stop analyzing every tiny little iota of this. Relax and enjoy. if it’s not meant to be then someone else will come along and you will know it. Appreciate what you have.


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