Lord, thank-you for silent suffering that brings our hidden sins to light, and the harms of sin to naught, and that turns the hurts of sin to joy. We praise you for freely given costly grace! Amen.
I’m thanking Jesus for His suffering for me. I am always mindful of it. I just remember grace and mercy. When I focus on the sacrifice Jesus made for me, I can’t help but be humbled. Today I went to three meetings(one was an AA and Al-Anon mix, the second was Al-Anon, and the third was one of my favorite AA meetings). All of the meetings related to the third step and focusing on our relationship with God.
I saw the guy I was supposed to hang out with last week. He looked great. I gave him a few big hugs. He said that he wanted to work on things. I asked him how much recovery time he had. He’s still working on it, so I told him to see me when he has a year. Then I realized that I will be really busy by that time. So it is best to just leave things where they are.
A good friend told me to pray for God to show me what to do and how things will work out. I thought I was doing that but I can definitely pray harder. The third step prayer involves us asking for God’s will to be done in our lives and not our own. I do want God’s perfect will to be done in my life, because I know my life will be better off for it. I can only mess things up when I try to take control.
I downloaded a note app thing and out of five things I only managed to cross out one lol. I still can’t believe that I almost didn’t leave the house today because I thought it was too cold. That is what jackets are for. I listened a lot and learned a lot today. I am really proud of myself.
I am going to read some of my big book tonight before bed. I love how I see God and recovery in everything now. It’s so interesting how much greater life can be sober. A few people asked me how my talk went last night and I just said ok. I think I kept it short and sweet. It truly is amazing how God can work in my life when I let Him.
I talked to my friend and I think we got things worked out(we are praying for each other). I have to keep reminding myself that just because I don’t have something major to worry about doesn’t mean I have to find stuff to worry about. That’s not my job.
Thank you for praying for me. I’m praying for you too.