Oh my goodness! I already think my life is a reality show. I just need the cameras and a network to cut me a check lol. It would be awesome if it were on the OWN network, but I would probably be ok with any network. The title of the show could be “Jewel’s Outrageous Life” because it really is truly outrageous(yeah I think I’m Jem).
Well, I think the show would be hilarious because I literally have to laugh out loud at myself every day. I don’t know what the theme song would be though. All of my go to items could be sponsors like T-Mobile, Gain, Brooks, and the library. Each day would be funnier than the day before because I cannot make up the stuff that happens in my life.
For instance, I *cough* rejoined the online dating world LOL. This is my fourth time in the past year or so. You would get to see such gems like “Hey! Are you real?” to the local favorite “Do you like to party?”. Haha! I told the first person, yes I am real. The second person I proudly told no. Now if you would have talked to me a few years ago, I would have said “Heck yeah”. Oh the joys of online dating. Where do I possibly start. Two different guys showed promise(out of thirty which has now increased to fifty). One seemed so similarly matched until he attempted to pin me down on “deeper relationship activities” to which I responded “So, are you cool with waiting?” and his response was basically “You repulse me and how dare you not let me indulge in my quest of deeper relationship activities”. This was like after an hour of conversation. Seriously. So I calmly responded with “I hope we both find what we are looking for”. The other guy, I don’t quite know what to say about him. The conversation started off nicely but three hours later I was responding out of lack of sleep. We also had the “deeper relationship” conversation and he said yes, but I am really all about seeing is believing. In the meantime there were also many “hit me up” messages and “When can I see you?” To which I responded “I like to take things slow”.
So today, while working on some papers(aka having all of the resources around me and skimming them efficiently),I had the bright idea to check out another popular site. This site is like the other site but on steroids. I had five messages before I had even finished my profile(the same profile from the other site just to see if anyone would notice). The guys on this site are quicker to indicate their interest and also give out their numbers. Which was shocking and intriguing at the same time. I felt like a broken record having to tell people that I was working on papers followed by the classic response “What are they about?”. Oh, my other personal favorite is the person who have listed “seeing someone” or the oh so popular “not looking for anything serious”. Can someone tell me why they would waste their time on a dating site? You know I had to ask. You know I did. So, one guy with no picture(who said I could check out his facebook which I did not look at) said that he did not have a picture up out of respect for the person he just got out of a relationship with(in case her friends saw his pic and told her), he did not want her to feel bad. It took me three re-dos to not go into my mode. So I just told him that he needed space and wished him luck.
One interesting question that I have gotten is “Why are you single” to which I respond with “Guys don’t really want a person of substance who has standards”. No one had a good comeback for that. I asked a few friends how long I should give it. Since I usually only last three days. I guess I can shoot for a month or so. I cannot make this stuff up folks. It is pure comedy.
Hang on for the ride 🙂